Psychology Orlando

Psychological Affiliates Inc delivers Orlando patients state of the art Psychologists services. Our experts specialize in Family Counseling, Psychology and Collaborative Divorce Psychology.

Why We Cheat

Deborah O. Day, Psy.D - Thursday, April 03, 2014

In a recent interview with Slate Magazine, Esther Perel, author and therapist, brings fresh perspectives to the age-old issue of infidelity. Surveys consistently show that most marriages/long-term relationships are touched by infidelity at some point. Ms. Perel cites research showing that very often, cheaters are basically happy with their marriages or relationships. This seems to be especially true for men. Most cheaters say they really do not want to leave their relationships, yet they are willing to take risks and seriously hurt their partners and families.

 

Esther Perel makes some excellent points in her interview. Key among them is her observation that what cheaters really are seeking is a different self. Through an affair, a different aspect of one’s personality is brought to life, often in an overwhelmingly intense manner. This intense activation of a perhaps long suppressed or previously unrecognized persona is the real unconscious goal rather than seeking to have a different lover.

 

Ms. Perel also draws a distinction between cheating and non-monogamy. She suggests that “examining monogamy is our next frontier.” Instead of the old roles of cheater and the cheated-upon, new relationship models are needed which can demonstrate how to respectfully handle the shades of grey around the many sexual/intimacy/friendship/digital issues that affect modern relationships.

 

Many couples still agree that sexual monogamy is their ideal. For these couples, a therapist can help impart and sharpen skills such as conflict resolution, caring behaviors, prioritization, and sexual enrichment. A therapist also can offer craving management to help relationships withstand challenges. For couples dealing with the aftermath of infidelity, a specific problem may need to be addressed, such as sexual avoidance or sexual addiction.

 

Other couples may mutually agree to explore more autonomy, self-expression, or personal fulfillment rather than cheating or lying to one another. Even an unconventional arrangement, such as swinging, requires relationship boundaries and expectations for both partners.

 

A qualified sex therapist can work within a couple’s value system to help improve their shared sexual satisfaction. Having the courage to address such delicate topics is a start. A therapist can help couples build upon that beginning by having both partners clarify their priorities and cultivate acceptance of one another.

 

Provided by Alan Grieco, Ph.D.

 | Trackbacks (0) | Permalink


Recent Posts


Tags

procedure mismatched sex drives hopeless phobias sex offender therapist expectations psychotherapy orlando disputes delicate topics mental health services sexual addiction mental health counselor studies divorce education orlando multiple personality disorder accept psychologist adjustment courts psychologists divided neuropsychologists Orlando therapists couples estates Orlando parenting plan evaluations not his fault Orlando Neuropsychological evaluations doctor politicians partner violence problems parent coordination smoking therapy family counseling orlando Orlando Family Mediation monitored exchange child's mental state spouses treatments undergo hypnosis Orlando mediators techniques struggling law enforcement consultants assessment relaxation friendship navigate PTSD live apart consult clarify questions discussion psychological modern relationship caring relief infidelity aftermath sleep disorders qualified life event appropriate ways caring behaviors Competency Restoration Training The Florida Bar issues sexual behavioral problems litigation support scientist modification legal agree priorities divorcing psychology Orlando neuropsychologist co-parenting therapy help relationships swinging parenting plans child psychologist orlando settlement child development access repressed thoughts bias towards call it quits orientation confusion love withstand grief loved deal lawyers arrangement satisfaction listening problem relationship stress reassurance success non-monogamy psychological evaluation dealing with anxiety Cooperative Parenting Institute Orlando psychologists addressed trial healthy habits suppression clarify priorities valued habits influence orlando sex therapy challenges better bias support courage repressed neuropsychologist delicate digital repressed thoughts medicine collaborative law loves heart buried memories before the divorce divorce trial consultants Parenting Coordinator lying specific problem ideal mediators forensic psychology affair alternative medicine sadness molestation agreement marry infidelity values psychological evaluations personality spouse Parenting Coordination Program trauma anti-anxiety family therapy addiction different self qualified therapist boundaries Neuropsychology dynamics family counseling acting out disorders couple's therapy contested custodies prioritization disorder phobia risks relationship models malicious divorce fulfillment sexual monogamy marriage counseling orlando fl growth boundary improve sexual satisfaction developments unsettling life event separation couple's problems Orlando family mediator delicate topic overeating habits out of court intense one another advantageous child behavior marriage problems friends scientists activities improve relationship therapy hypnotherapy sex offender cheater undergo unconscious learning and growth mediator emotions sex therapy orlando stress-relieving behaviors consultation struggling child mental health self conflict married communication problem develop divorce healing time-sharing memories judge help withdraw Orlando sex offender therapy attorney respect divorce coaches hypnosis families attorneys Orlando mediation law enforcement specialists divided loyalties class orlando respectfully unsettling cheated messy divorce court troubled monetary value shades of grey parent better the relationship fault value system psychologists orlando psychotherapist behavior modification post traumatic stress disorder address state of mind mental illness withstand challenges qualified sex therapist deserves neuroanatomy relationships another suppressed Orlando psychologist evaluate sex therapy mess of a divorce craving management family topics for discussion partner mental states talking points sleep disorder sexual satisfaction autonomy repressed memories social pragmatic communication disorder mediates effective Orlando hypnotherapy marriage counseling mind swingers substance abuse repression neurodevelopmental disorders neuropsychological evaluations sexual avoidance foundation alimony relationship woes psychologists in orlando cheating influential habit counseling communication problems swing unconventional treatment family mediation medical persona conflict resolution psychosexual evaluations marriage communication beginning relocation disputes act out improving thoughts Orlando collaborative divorce child abuse Orlando supervised visitation sex masturbation sex therapist overeating abuse unconventional arrangement anxious talk therapy sexual sex offender therapy aftermath therapist's roles adult expectation licensed psychologist therapists in orlando long-term relationship depression without bias prenuptial agreements negotiations anxiety cheated-upon child custody marriage troubles parenting plan personal fulfillment access expression dealing with stress property neurological abnormality psychometrist dynamic swinger leave needs mental examination modern relationships help relationship children forensic psychological evaluations collaborative divorce psychotherapy litigation tools assess mediation brain therapist lover learning friendly terms determine smoking cessation mental state relationship boundaries family psychotherapy paternity couples counseling evaluation professional self-expression sexual trauma Orlando psychotherapy psychology orlando acceptance partners newly divorced parents development suffering intimacy psychiatric sexual enrichment

Archive

2737 West Fairbanks Avenue,  Winter Park, FL. 32789    Phone: 407-674-5663

 

©2011 Psychological Affiliates - ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Developed - Design by Windermere Design