Psychology Orlando

Psychological Affiliates Inc delivers Orlando patients state of the art Psychologists services. Our experts specialize in Family Counseling, Psychology and Collaborative Divorce Psychology.

Why We Cheat

Deborah O. Day, Psy.D - Thursday, April 03, 2014

In a recent interview with Slate Magazine, Esther Perel, author and therapist, brings fresh perspectives to the age-old issue of infidelity. Surveys consistently show that most marriages/long-term relationships are touched by infidelity at some point. Ms. Perel cites research showing that very often, cheaters are basically happy with their marriages or relationships. This seems to be especially true for men. Most cheaters say they really do not want to leave their relationships, yet they are willing to take risks and seriously hurt their partners and families.

 

Esther Perel makes some excellent points in her interview. Key among them is her observation that what cheaters really are seeking is a different self. Through an affair, a different aspect of one’s personality is brought to life, often in an overwhelmingly intense manner. This intense activation of a perhaps long suppressed or previously unrecognized persona is the real unconscious goal rather than seeking to have a different lover.

 

Ms. Perel also draws a distinction between cheating and non-monogamy. She suggests that “examining monogamy is our next frontier.” Instead of the old roles of cheater and the cheated-upon, new relationship models are needed which can demonstrate how to respectfully handle the shades of grey around the many sexual/intimacy/friendship/digital issues that affect modern relationships.

 

Many couples still agree that sexual monogamy is their ideal. For these couples, a therapist can help impart and sharpen skills such as conflict resolution, caring behaviors, prioritization, and sexual enrichment. A therapist also can offer craving management to help relationships withstand challenges. For couples dealing with the aftermath of infidelity, a specific problem may need to be addressed, such as sexual avoidance or sexual addiction.

 

Other couples may mutually agree to explore more autonomy, self-expression, or personal fulfillment rather than cheating or lying to one another. Even an unconventional arrangement, such as swinging, requires relationship boundaries and expectations for both partners.

 

A qualified sex therapist can work within a couple’s value system to help improve their shared sexual satisfaction. Having the courage to address such delicate topics is a start. A therapist can help couples build upon that beginning by having both partners clarify their priorities and cultivate acceptance of one another.

 

Provided by Alan Grieco, Ph.D.

 | Trackbacks (0) | Permalink


Recent Posts


Tags

Parenting Coordination Program beginning alimony leave relationship boundaries lover evaluation valued modern relationships loves parent boundary cheated sex therapist phobia evaluate courage swingers infidelity aftermath appropriate ways relief troubled relationship therapy mediators parenting plans multiple personality disorder Orlando Neuropsychological evaluations lawyers communication problem swinging fulfillment divided parent coordination buried memories struggling child mental states Orlando Family Mediation monetary value ideal neuroanatomy PTSD swinger neurodevelopmental disorders child psychologist orlando self-expression addressed advantageous needs mental illness family treatment autonomy friendly terms improving unsettling communication non-monogamy sex therapy determine access repressed thoughts infidelity delicate topic personality healthy habits growth mental examination divorce trial tools alternative medicine improve sexual satisfaction mediation suppression children relationship couple's therapy marriage problems psychologists in orlando sexual addiction sex sexual sleep disorders family psychotherapy sex offender therapist judge relationships deal sadness talking points families licensed psychologist mental health counselor talk therapy Orlando mediation scientist psychometrist attorneys intense prioritization qualified agree Cooperative Parenting Institute developments suppressed professional Orlando psychologists acceptance value system relocation disputes navigate stress-relieving caring smoking issues neurological abnormality risks friendship mind disputes mental health services unconventional arrangement partners Orlando mediators scientists develop reassurance unsettling life event stress thoughts Competency Restoration Training call it quits consultants divorce coaches disorder psychological Orlando neuropsychologist expectation sex therapy orlando without bias partner psychotherapist repressed thoughts address time-sharing forensic psychology long-term relationship neuropsychologists deserves psychiatric courts Orlando family mediator relationship models satisfaction sexual enrichment adjustment treatments social pragmatic communication disorder couple's problems undergo hypnosis discussion psychotherapy help relationship better the relationship legal sexual satisfaction acting out different self agreement dealing with stress sexual monogamy parenting plan state of mind not his fault delicate topics Orlando collaborative divorce specific problem disorders malicious divorce consult estates cheated-upon hypnosis attorney topics for discussion foundation activities dynamics influential expectations marriage troubles law enforcement specialists parents success unconventional suffering act out mediator mediates techniques boundaries prenuptial agreements co-parenting therapy contested custodies psychological evaluations marriage counseling orlando fl psychological evaluation communication problems collaborative divorce mismatched sex drives medical support struggling live apart priorities assess newly divorced marry love effective clarify priorities conflict monitored exchange life event property undergo child development withdraw swing child abuse questions Orlando psychotherapy married habits Orlando parenting plan evaluations abuse substance abuse child's mental state Parenting Coordinator another litigation qualified sex therapist persona divided loyalties class orlando cheating grief orientation confusion delicate behavior modification separation qualified therapist better anxious out of court modification politicians The Florida Bar aftermath relaxation procedure psychology orlando withstand challenges modern relationship emotions healing one another paternity trauma therapy affair studies shades of grey medicine divorcing trial brain negotiations hopeless child addiction consultation Orlando hypnotherapy accept listening post traumatic stress disorder family therapy before the divorce psychology mess of a divorce couples family counseling orlando litigation support sexual behavioral problems respect help divorce sex offender habit withstand Orlando supervised visitation cheater depression respectfully psychotherapy orlando Orlando psychologist assessment mental health counseling partner violence messy divorce overeating child custody problem Orlando therapists marriage counseling couples counseling settlement friends doctor family mediation improve phobias dynamic neuropsychologist personal fulfillment unconscious self caring behaviors lying learning and growth collaborative law anxiety molestation heart repression access intimacy adult dealing with anxiety help relationships relationship woes family counseling bias psychologist digital law enforcement consultants repressed sex offender therapy Neuropsychology development arrangement hypnotherapy conflict resolution behavior neuropsychological evaluations bias towards sleep disorder smoking cessation loved influence expression psychologists Orlando sex offender therapy craving management therapist's roles spouse divorce education orlando psychologists orlando fault sexual trauma challenges forensic psychological evaluations memories learning orlando sex therapy overeating habits marriage mental state values masturbation psychosexual evaluations repressed memories spouses anti-anxiety behaviors clarify therapist sexual avoidance therapists in orlando court problems

Archive

2737 West Fairbanks Avenue,  Winter Park, FL. 32789    Phone: 407-674-5663

 

©2011 Psychological Affiliates - ALL RIGHTS RESERVED

Developed - Design by Windermere Design