Sex. Let’s talk about it. For some it is never an easy topic to discuss, for others it’s their favorite subject.
No matter if you can or don’t want to talk about it, sex is still very important in any long term
relationship. One of the biggest obstacles couples may have to overcome is having mismatched sex
drives. It’s a nice romantic notation that you and your partner will always have the same sexual appetite
forever. In reality, there are going to be times in a relationship where one partner’s need for sex and
intimacy is going to be higher than the others. It happens. But it is not the end of the world. The key is to
talk about it!
The only problem with talking about your sexual desires and needs is… it’s awkward. How are you
supposed to tell the person you love that you feel undesirable or embarrassed, when they want less sex
than you? Or that you feel pressured into sex when their appetites are higher? So instead of talking
about it, we sweep it under a rug. Ignore it until it becomes an even bigger problem. In this case,
sometimes seeking out help is the best option to open up and help save the relationship.
Psychological Affiliates is the best in
Orlando sex therapy. During these counseling sessions, couples are
encouraged to be honest and direct about their tastes and needs. Talking about it head on will help to
understand one another and to see the impact it has been taking on the relationship and intimacy. Being
intimate with a partner is more than sex. It is about being completely vulnerable with the one you care
about most. Dropping defenses and walls you have built up around yourself for fear that they may reject
you. By having a third party come in and help mediate, you may find it a lot easier to open up with your
partner.
Moving forward counseling is also able to help couples figure out to compromise when sex drives
become mismatched again. For instance, if life has become too chaotic and you are feeling stressed out,
perhaps a quick weekend away will help to take a break from real life and focus on your relationship.
Sometimes mismatched sex drives occur because sex feels like a routine and you are in a rut. This can be
an easier fix. Meeting with a therapist may help you to explore new ideas to get you back in the mood,
such as toys, fantasies, date night ideas and masturbation. Yes. Masturbation. Society has made this act
something to be ashamed of, but can in fact be quite healthy.
There is no “normal” sex drive. You are perfectly fine. However, if you and your partner feel like the love
is gone, coming in for sex therapy is the first step in rekindling the magic. The overall goal for working
with mismatched sex drives is to create acceptance and honesty with your partner, while working on
behavioral changes you both can benefit from.